Archive for the Uncategorized Category

A brief history of Identity

Posted in Uncategorized on October 30, 2013 by dusmi08

“Have you ever considered that the whole world his shaped by a lack of words”
 -George Orwell, 1984

 There is a word, tatamae, that means the way we act, and the the things we pretend to believe so that others may accept us.

 I tell you about tatamae so that I may talk about identity; because tatmae is the evil twin of identity. Whereas identity asks “Who am I”, tatamae claims “I am this”.

“You are not your {…} your khaki pants”
 -Tyler Durden, Fight Club

In recent years I’ve seen a real struggle within society, a desire by others to claim their identity rather than to let it grow from introspection and awareness, a “fast food” method to life.

My own story of identity is strongly tied to a desire to be a finished product rather than a process. Coming from a rural area I stuck out like a sore thumb, I had learned to speak by watching television and therefore did not have the local accent.

I read books, watched documentaries, and enjoyed PBS; for the area I was an odd ball to say the least. My total lack of social skills didn’t help with my emotional state, or give my parents confidence that I wouldn’t embarrass them should I be allowed to go out on my own.

Then something began to change, my father was granted visitation rights, and convinced me to join the Boy Scouts of America. I was 15 when I first joined but threw myself into the culture with great fervor.

In 3 years’ time I had earned the rank of Eagle Scout a feat that left some people scratching their heads. To this day I still quote my oath and laws:


“A scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly… etc.”

 “On my honor I will do my best to do my duty …”


The beauty of the scout laws are in their descriptive quality not I am, but a scout is; there is a choice in becoming these things. “On my Honor”, not “I will without deviation”: you can hold on to an idea like honor giving it meaning and value, or let it go since it’s just a word. I had to ask myself what did honor mean to me, and the meaning made the difference.

Flash forward a few years and I’m studying martial arts. While Karate didn’t make me Chuck Norris it did allow me to face the fear of confrontation, and when particular blowhards lost to me in sparing matches there was a level of satisfaction I can’t deny. The best thing that era of my life taught me was that fear is overcome by doing. There was a beauty in the moment of competition where I lost the world around me and found how flow. Tatamae teaches you to be afraid, identity teaches you to flow, to be and to be content.

But it wasn’t until college that I began to apply this, those years at the university removed from my rural area and exposed to diversity I began to flourish. I’ve been known to tell people that I was raised in North Carolina, but born in Oklahoma, because that’s where I felt I became a person.

It was there I met good friends with values, and went to counseling. It was there that I wasn’t the odd kid, but a hard worker and introspective.

It was there I was able to make connections with people on the basis of values and not social circles, or neighborhoods. It was a place where people got a second chance and could reinvent themselves out side of their comfort zone.

It was a place where you found out who you really were.
A place where meaning triumphs over ceremony.


Satellite Warfare

Posted in Uncategorized on March 2, 2011 by dusmi08

In this installment I’m going to introduce you to a concept called satellite warfare.

The principle is two large powerful bodies come into conflict, but since they are both large and powerful a direct assault on each other would be catastrophic to either party.

It’s a fight neither can really win. So what do these two super powers do; they use smaller anonymous groups to attack the other.

A good example is the cold war the US and the USSR would never come into direct conflict with each other, but they would support other countries like Cuba or Afghanistan.
Right now I’m at a point in the book where the two sides are becoming more clear, and- thanks to a well timed fishing trip- the two “super powers”, their relationship to the characters we follow, and their motives are explained.
As I write my book, it becomes more apparent I’m reading it at the same time.

Mood: exhausted

Posted in Uncategorized on February 10, 2011 by dusmi08

I’m recovering from a 50+ hour work week.

Recently there were some changes in the chain of command at my job.

It’s good, makes for good source material, especially since I’m reaching a point in my writing where I need to promote Daylin.


I’ve reached a point where I feel it’s time to shift the story forward. As a writer I find my self getting to the point where I literally have to shake the Earth and push the characters forward skipping some of the developmental process.


And that make sense in a catch 22 way. We read to relate to life and characters, but we also read to escape life and explore new places.

So the writer has to balance believability with pace.

You race boredom but you don’t try to get too far ahead of it


Your Collaborator #2

Posted in Uncategorized on January 13, 2011 by dusmi08

Take two separate open domain characters of different origins and switch their worlds

1. Tom Sawyer

2. Dracula

3. King Arthur

4. Robin Rood

5. The Wolf Man

6. Frankenstein

7. Captian Nemo

8. Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde

How does the characters and stories change with a switch. Take for instance switching Dracula and Robin hood.

1. Dracula and his merry Men must rescue England from the evil Prince John. Of course Dracula doesn’t care about saving England he just wants to defeat John so he can have his curse lifted and die.

2. Robin of Locksley returns to England from the crusades changed forever after a chance encounter with a strange prisoner in a Turkish dungeon. Robin soon finds he has strange powers and a thirst for blood; haunted by this he must hide from both the Sheriff of Nottingham and Church officials who want him dead

Or Frankenstein and King Arthur

1. Desperate to have a heir to the throne Arthur uses magic to create a “son” from inanimate objects. At first the new prince is harmless, but as the people of Camelot mistreat him he grows violent until Arthur is forced to destroy him

2. Captured by Royal English authories Dr. Frankenstein is forced to reanimate the King of England using spare parts of the royal family -after an attack of some kind that is.

The beauty of this exercise is that it doesn’t need to be the specific characters, it can be their archetype’s. By plying the archtype of one story into the backdrop of another you force an orginal concept to grow

Brain storm and comment below


Audio Excerpt

Posted in Uncategorized on January 12, 2011 by dusmi08

I have an account with this is an audio excerpt of pages 1-28, the voice reads faster than I’d like, but none the less here is a sample of the work

Getting to know them

Posted in Uncategorized on January 12, 2011 by dusmi08

Daylin Loveless

Daylin is the protagonist of the story. As a nocturnal his body is covered with a shadow. Daylin is different from other nocturnals in that fact his best friend- Golem Quarry- and his wife- Hope- are both luminaries, their bodies reflect light. Daylin represents my internal struggle to be viewed as heroic or at least decent despite the feeling others view me as “evil”

His central theme is that he doesn’t fit into either world. He’s elevated to greatness but would rather be at home with his family.

Progress Jan,04 2011

Posted in Uncategorized on January 4, 2011 by dusmi08

So far the book is coming well.

I’ve been reading a book called Evil: a Primer, it deals with the philosophical and historical aspects of evil.

Which precedes the other Evil acts, or evil motivation?

Some times villains commit evil acts without evil motivation. Large groups often hide behind central figures to justify their actions

“We were just following orders”

“Doing the will of someone else”

Last night I skipped the revisions for a bit and added new material.
I’ve been hinting at a society called “The Order of Illumination” a group that is secretly working to reshape the world into a “perfect” place

I’ll be adding more material involving the order in my revisions. I expect them to be central figures in the coming work